"Clear"

I forcibly told James we needed some selfies to post about the great news today.  I've always felt supported by God and unable to rest in my own strength, but today God give us the gift of great hope. James and I went to my appointment with  Dr. Julia Cogburn at Florida Cancer Specialists in Tampa at 12:30pm this afternoon.   I FINALLY heard the words that we had been hoping and praying for since October 2nd, "Your PET scan is clear of cancer."  I don't think the brevity of the news sunk in until after we left the office.  We were told that the only possibly questionable spot on the PET scan (done on Saturday) was in the area where I had had 9 lymph nodes removed on Tuesday (due to a microscopic cancer found on the sentinel lymph node previously plus the PET scan "spot").  ALL 9 LYMPH NODES WERE 100 PERCENT FREE OF CANCER (even after dissection)!  So, the slightly questionable color in the lymph area on the PET was only due to inflammation from the previous lymph node removal.  This means no skin/tissue damaging radiation is needed!  This makes reconstruction much easier for the surgeon and also makes it a much quicker process.  The skin never heals completely after high dose radiation exposure, so this is great news! 

Also, the cancer genetics showed a 35-40 percent chance of cancer (in the breast or otherwise) recurrence with no further treatment, and less than 14 percent risk of recurrence with only 4 rounds of chemo and 5 years of hormone blockers (which I plan to take them for 10 years which will decrease the risk even more!).  This treatment will not be easy, but will kill precancerous cells in the lymphatic system and in the blood, and will also cut off what feeds my type of cancer in the breast tissue (estrogen).  Not all cancers will respond well to chemo, and not all will respond well to hormone blockers.  Thankfully mine is "beaten up" by both! Though my cancer is considered aggressive, it is moderately aggressive rather than super aggressive, requiring 4 rounds of less toxic chemo, rather than 8 rounds of super toxic chemo!  This is what we have been praying for.  My oncologist is also supportive of vitamin infusions between treatments to keep my body strong, and to keep my kidneys and heart healthy.  (We are in the process of trying to find physicians that perform these infusions for lower costs and/or take insurance for the treatments.)  Though we have a long road with a lot of difficulty ahead, we are joyful in knowing that God has taken care of the cancer in my body!  We are also thankful that He has given my doctors the knowledge of how to prevent it from coming back.  Cancer is not welcome here anymore!  . . . Big God . . . little cancer.   

We cannot thank you enough for your support an encouragement!  God has really blessed us in ways we certainly don't deserve.  Evidence is all around.  Please continue to pray for us as we embark on the chemotherapy journey (as well as treatments to prevent lymphodema)!

PET results and Recovery from Surgery

 

So I'm starting recovery again, and this time there was more pain the first few days but I'm actually starting to feel better more quickly.  I still need to be very easy on my right arm to prevent complications, as 6 lymph nodes were removed on that side. (I'm going to a lymphodema prevention specialist on Tuesday and will find out more about restrictions during recovery about that time.)   I will forever have an increased risk of infection on the right side, and will need to be careful about touching anything that may have bacteria with my right hand (hello cleaning gloves!).  Please join us in praying that there are no complications with having had the nodes removed, especially lymphodema, which is incurable.  Please also join us in praising God that preliminary results show no cancer in the auxiliary lymph nodes!  This is especially miraculous, as my PET results came back CLEAN except for a small spot on the right lymph nodes (which the doctor is now saying was probably just inflammation left over after the other surgery!)  Last time we had a "clear lymph nodes" result at surgery, they found a microscopic cancer in the sentinel lymph node later.  This, combined with the spot on the PET, lead my surgical oncologist to remove all the auxiliary lymph nodes on the right side on levels 1 and 2 (out of 3 levels).  We are praising God for the preliminary results and asking God for a "clear of all visible cancer" result after pathology results come back.  

Jimmy (and Josh) have sweetly worn their "team Jen" shirts a few times, sometimes pulling them out of the dirty laundry saying "I want to wear my punch mom's cancer in the booty shirt!" . . . Love them so much.  Though they can't understand everything, they are interested in learning and understanding as much as they can.  Its so neat seeing them, particularly Jimmy, trust God to care for me.  Jimmy told me today that God healed me from my cancer but I still need medicine keep it from coming back. He also said that God is really the only one that can "beat up" cancer.   So much wisdom from such a young mind.  We are praying that Jimmy is right that the cancer is gone!  We 

will find out more on Friday and Monday about: the PET scan, the oncotype (cancer genetics= aggressive nature of the cancer), and the pathology results from the lymph nodes removed on Tuesday.   Please pray for low aggressiveness, clear lymph nodes in the recent surgery, and clear definitive result of no cancer on the PET scan (now that we have removed and tested lymph nodes in the questionable area).  

Please also pray that I heal quickly from the surgery and am able to start chemo on the scheduled date.  The sweet nurses gave me a heart for my surgery drain (starting over again with that!  :P).  My surgical oncologist reminds me of a caring father, "You're gonna be okay kid."  We are blessed beyond measure with my treatment team (and they all meet together to make sure all the bases are covered!)  Please pray that God guides us in finding and making decisions on reputable IV nutrition from holistic physicians that are willing to work with my hemotology oncologist and is knowledgeable, yet sympathetic to the financial hurdles of cancer patients.

I can't thank you all enough.  For those not on facebook, I wanted to share this recent post I made:

  

To the individual that annonymously blessed us with $100 for my cancer treatment (among so many others who have blessed us with prayers, giftcards, gifts, etc): We cannot thank you enough. We are embarking on a journey, where only conventional medicine is covered by insurance. In addition to chemotherapy, we are hoping I can have nutritional IVs to build up and detox my body, at times when my oncologist says its ok. This seems like a no brainer. My kidneys and heart are already struggling before chemo, so we need to strengthen them as much as possible. This is not covered by insurance and costs $150-$200 per IV, costing upwards of $3000 total. We are using vegetable juicing and essential oils with very high anti-oxident properties to neutralize cancer causing free radicals. This is not covered by insurance, yet taking these steps to strengthen my body yields a 50 percent reduction in cancer re-occurrence. Using caps to save my hair is also not covered by insurance. Thank you kind person, for helping me to stay strong, and in turn helping me to be strong for my kids and my family. We cannot thank you enough! (And in case you didn't catch it, we are thankful for ALL that are sacrificing for us, I am using this as an example. Though we are stretched, we would not even be able to think about some of these treatments if we didn't have help. Thanks for showing us love!)

See this:

Several studies of high-dose vitamin C in patients with cancer have been done in recent years, including the following:

Studies of vitamin C alone

Intravenous (IV) vitamin C was studied in patients with breast cancer who were treated with adjuvant chemotherapy and radiation therapy. The study found that patients who received IV vitamin C had better quality of life and fewer side effects than those who did not.
A study of IV vitamin C and high doses of vitamin C taken by mouth was done in patients with cancer that could not be cured. Vitamin C was shown to be a safe and effective therapy to improve quality of life in these patients, including physical, mental, and emotional functions, symptoms of fatigue, nausea and vomiting, pain, and appetite loss.
Vitamin C has been shown to be safe when given to healthy volunteers and cancer patients at doses up to 1.5 g/kg, while screening out patients with certain risk factors who should avoid vitamin C. Studies have also shown that Vitamin C levels in the blood are higher when taken by IV than when taken by mouth, and last for more than 4 hours.

Unexpected Surgery NEXT WEEK

So I am using the above copyrighted photo as a sample, to show you what I'm talking about when I describe how I need to have surgery in order to have more lymph nodes removed.  There was a spot of malignant cancer (.4mm) on the right sentinal lymph node (normally breast cancer's first lymph node to invade-- you have one-two on both sides).  This is so microscopic that some oncologists don't know whether to count that as a positive or negative lymph node.  My hemotology oncologist (Dr. Julia Cogburn at Florida Cancer Specialists) is concerned that there could be a microscopic dot on another lymph node, since the lymphatic system is connected, and that if not removed it could cause the cancer to be able to metastasize.  My surgical oncologist is very conservative, and skilled (his brother actually started the breast center at MOFFIT, then they opened a private practice together).  He painstakingly takes samples of areas that would make a difference cosmetically, before just removing it all.  He is cognizant of making sure there are more than adequate margins of healthy tissue as well.   Normally when auxillary lymph nodes are removed, all 5 are removed together.  Dr. Cox will remove the next two lymph nodes on the right side only, and if clear, will leave the rest alone. (Please pray that the first two lymph nodes come back clear and that the rest will be left alone!)  Many surgeons would remove all 5, but he would rather painstakingly test each one, and then take more only if needed, so that I can minimize my risk of lymphodema (long term swelling in the arm that can be difficult to treat).  This, I thank him for!  I thank God for my combination of physicians that are so caring for my well-being, physically and emotionally.  I will also have a port placed on the right side of my chest during the same surgery to keep my veins healthy during chemotherapy infusions (an implant under the skin that will later be removed).  Yay for two implants!  At least I'll have one on each side now.  Haa!  (Actually please pray that I adjust to it quickly and that it causes minimal scaring.  The number of scars on my body is getting ridiculous.  I look forward to having no scars in heaven someday.)

So my husband actually has a procedure on the 28th, and has no vacation days left, except one for the 28th (he used the other ones for my first surgery).  A sweet friend of mine has offered to go to the surgery with me.  What an outpouring of love!  You know who you are, thank you!  And, if any of my dear friends have to face surgery alone, please let me come be with you.  I would like to "pay it forward" the comfort of just having someone to pray with and "be there."

On that note, I have been researching Vitamin infusions to help if any of you know a good physician in the Tampa area that does infusions, to remove toxins and boost immune system for cancer patients, let me know.  I've found a couple, but time is short and I need to move quickly cause chemo starts before Christmas!  On that note, please pray that the oncotype report comes back as moderate or low aggressiveness.  We know that the cancer is not super low aggression, which is why I need at least some chemotherapy, but right now I only need 4 rounds of less toxic chemo, instead of 8 rounds of super toxic chemo, which could have longer lasting effects on my body.   The more toxic chemo regimen is required if the cancer comes back as super aggressive.  Thanks for your prayers!

A lot of people have said that I'm dealing with a lot.  Yeah, ok, its a lot.  I'm not specially equipped for hardship (that I can tell), I'm not strong.  I just know God has my back. I didn't pick cancer, but I am confident that God allowed it in my life for a reason.   And He has my family's back to.  Do I have moments of weakness?  ohh yeah, we all do,   But usually I'm just like this <3:

3 Weeks after surgery: Chemo or Not to Chemo

So its 3 weeks post surgery.  Pathology results have come back so I thought that I should share them (because my sweet friends keep asking.)  Honestly I wasn't ready to talk about the results at first.  Though stage 1 cancer, it has had lymph node involvement (which we did not expect) and is very aggressive (with a higher risk of re-occurrence than the doctors are comfortable with not doing more treatment).   The tumor in the right breast had grown from 1.2 cm to 1.5 cm in length, in a matter of 4 weeks (so now stage 1c, rather than 1b). There was also 5cm of  DCIS (basically cancer in the milk ducts that hasn't created tumors and is contained in the ducts), also in the right breast.   The lymph node involvement, as well as the aggressive nature of the cancer means that we and my doctors need to be prudent in making sure to kill any cells that may have "escaped" into the blood stream or into the lymphatic system.  This means at least 4 rounds of chemotherapy., and possible radiation of the remaining lymph nodes (but we hope this will not be needed).  Now, I would say that I like to use a combination of western and holistic medicine.  I think an awareness of both, and how God has revealed things to both types of physicians and health scientists is important.  So, I'm working on gathering essential oils, doing research on a better juicer, signing up for accupuncture, and researching cold caps for the hair (basically cryogenic freezing so that it comes "alive" again after each chemo session without having been damaged).  All of these things will be used along with shots to boost my white blood cells and immune system!  Check out before and afters for using the "chemo cold caps" to save hair!

Honestly, I count it as a miracle that folks at the Florida Cancer Specialist Center use these scalp freezing caps frequently and can help me!  These caps are NOT well known and sadly some cancer patients don't even know they have the options.  Jimmy was really worried that I might lose my hair.  I don't want to stress him more than I need to (and wigs ARE NOT CHEAP!)  So if you know anyone that will be having chemo, let them know about the cold caps!  I understand if people decide that its not worth it, but they should at least have the choice :). 

Hair aside, I have to admit that I was very stressed the first few days after learning that I would probably require chemotherapy.  My biggest fear was needing chemo, and being told I couldn't have it because of my heart and kidney disease.  But I'm only 35.  We need to fight aggressively to prevent recurrence, because being this young, along with the aggressive nature of my cancer, does not hold a good prognosis without more treatment for me.  I had a few moments of "God what are you doing?" But I came to the realization that the fact that I can have chemo, and that my cells are easily recognized by chemo as abnormal, is really a blessing.  Some folks have a type of cancer that chemo is less effective against because they look more like normal cells.  The more things that we can throw at the disease to make sure it is gone, as well as keep my immune system strong, the better.  

What to pray:   Please join us in praying that the testing that my hematology oncologist performed to determine a more precise aggressiveness rating for the cancer will come back as moderate or low and not high.  If the rating comes back as high it is likely that I will need a longer and more toxic chemo regimen which may be hard on my heart, which already has enough problems.  Please pray that the doctors will make the right decisions regarding radiation.  Obviously I don't want to have cancer, but radiation also damages skin and will make any reconstruction efforts more difficult.  My surgical oncologist does not want to remove the rest of my lymph nodes because the "dot" that he found on the sentinal lymph node was so small that it is very unlikely that there would be cancer anywhere else in the lymphatic system.  So, he does not want to remove the rest of my lymph nodes to check and potentially cause swelling (lymphodema).  For this reason, I may need to have the remaining lymph nodes radiated. Please pray that I will not be too sick or tired, that my children will be well taken care of, and that James will be well taken care of.  Ultimately we pray and trust that God will heal me. I look forward to being cancer free!  

On a less vital (but painful) note, I still have had to keep the surgery drains in (going on week 3!) because my body is creating a lot more fluid than the plastic surgeon is comfortable with.  Please pray that my body heals quickly and well with no infection.  On that note, chemo also drastically increases your risk of infection so please pray that I do not get sick (and please kindly stay in your home if you or your kids are sick as common courtesy . . . you never know when someone might have a compromised immune system.  Their life might depend on you being courteous to them by not knowingly exposing them to germs).

James and I are so thankful that everything has been healing well.  Look!  In a dress you can pin the surgery drains to the inside and no one is the wiser (until they see you moving like a stiff puppet with a stick up its shirt :p.   I got to go with James to his Christmas work party which was amazing.  His coworkers have been such an encouragement to us in various ways.  I can't thank them enough.   

Then I got to go to the TBPC Christmas Brunch with this beauty!  My mum has been such a blessing to us the last week, and we get to keep her til Saturday (along with my sister Rosie).  Its been fun being "normal."  Honestly at times the appointments, drug lists, and various tasks related to having this disease are daunting in and of themselves.  Though I'm in pain and still having trouble sleeping at night, being able to breathe in pockets of "normal" at times is such a gift!  Thank you God!

ps  I have had a few friends ask how to help with my "keep Jen's hair" fund.  Hair saving is not covered by insurance and costs a few thousand dollars.    Here is the link if interested:  click here